After losing a loved one to suicide, we are left living in an unfamiliar place. We have changed, and the world around us has changed. In an attempt to gain some sense of normalcy, we search for answers. Not only answers related to the death of our loved one, but answers on when the pain will end. We desperately look for a "how to" book on grief. While there are a number of books to support the grief journey, there isn't one that provide you ...
Blame and Suicide
With most other causes of death, it seems survivors have at least one source to “blame” for taking away a loved one, which can provide a sense of comfort and closure we humans so desperately need. Whether it’s blaming a life-threatening disease, an at-fault party in an accident, or a violent criminal, anger and sadness can be directed their way, allowing those left behind to focus on grieving the innocence of the one lost. Suicide isn’t so black ...
The Little Things
Why does it take a tragedy to make us aware of what really matters in life? One struggle I have found many survivors face after a suicide is caring about other people's small stuff. Survivors will tell me that they feel anger and resentment towards others who complain about situations that seem so miniscule. We no longer look at the world through the same lens, yet the people around us do. This is extremely difficult as we work to reunite ...
Conversations about Suicide
This week we welcome guest blogger, Deborah Greene, who lost her father to suicide on April 20th, 2015. She offers her reflection on the last conversation she had with her father prior to his death. We thank Deborah for a sharing a piece of her grief journey with us.
In one of the last conversations that I had with my father, I recounted an episode of severe depression that he’d experienced when I was a child. He had left his job after ...
Coping with Additional Loss
Last month I wrote a post on secondary loss, and how we can cope with the additional loss we face in the aftermath of a suicide. One of the tips I had, was managing our expectations for the relationships we have with others. While I have witnessed and been told stories about people turning their backs on the people who need them most, I have also witnessed people doing extraordinary things. We tend to put a great deal of pressure on the people ...
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