Guest blogger Michelle H., who lost her son to suicide, returns again this week to share about an aspect of loss we have heard many survivors talk about in group meetings: the significance of particular dates and times associated with a loved one's death. Can you relate?
How Markers of Time Evolve
I've been thinking about why the markers of time are so important to me. In the first few months, I marked the time following my son's death by days ...
Why I Hate The Stages of Grief
To date, the search words that bring the most visitors to our blog are centered around the Stages of Grief specifically those following a suicide. Every time I see those search terms, I cringe a little. For a couple reasons. One, it saddens me that there are so many people searching for the answer to when their pain will end. Two, because as a society we have given people this notion that grief not only HAS stages, but it has a specified end. ...
The Heart vs. the Head after Losing Dad to Suicide
My father would have celebrated his 66th birthday this past January. As we have every year since the day he left this world, my sister and I post a message on his FaceBook page as a tribute to the man we called "Dad" for so many years. Many people "liked" this message, and commented about how they miss his audacious self. Among those comments lied one in particular that initially angered me. Yet, as I thought about it throughout the day I ...
How could you abandon me? Life after Suicide.
I do not need to tell you how difficult life after suicide is. We are pulled in many directions as we try and make sense of what just happened. Our brain is put in overdrive as we try and conceptualize how this could have happened to us. We often talk about the anger and sorrow we feel in the aftermath of traumatic loss. Guilt and shame play a leading role in our grief story often impacting our ability to not only forgive our loved one, but ...
Why is Grief Following Suicide so Hard!
Grief following suicide sucks doesn't it? I mean nobody really wants to lose anyone they love, rather it is by natural causes or some tragic manner like suicide. But it happens. Death is a part of life. After I lost my father, I was taken on a journey that I never saw coming. I am a planner; someone who likes predictability. Natural death, while extremely sad, is predictable. When I lost my grandmother, a woman who I spent my life ...
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