Offering hope, comfort and support for survivors of suicide loss.
We are all searching for the roadmap for grief. Something to guide us, give us predictability, and most importantly, tell us when the pain will end. Let me let you in on a little secret....this roadmap doesn't exist. It simply would be impossible to create. Nobody's grief journey is the same, because no two relationships are the same, and no two pasts are the same. Two children can grow up in the same house, and view every experience ...
We often talk about the pain associated with the past after losing a loved one to suicide. Regrets about not doing things differently can be consuming in the aftermath of a tragic loss. What we fail to discuss is the pain experienced when we are forced to accept what will never be. Whether you are conscious of it or not, we are constantly making plans for the future. We look at our children and imagine who they will one day become. We never ...
Regardless of my father's suicide, I have always disliked the question, "How are you?" Do people really want to know the answer? I'm not sure people are even equipped to deal with anything other than, "I'm ok." What makes it more difficult is when you are struggling with a response. "How are you?" How difficult is it to find an answer when you yourself don't know. This is what happens in the aftermath of a suicide loss. It is difficult to ...
Being a survivor of a suicide loss is hard, there is no question about it. We are left with an unfinished story. We struggle to find people who understand the pain we are feeling. We work to make sense of this new world we are living in. We all know how difficult it is. So, why are we so hard on ourselves? I often hear other survivors of a suicide loss talk about their struggles. They talk about their flaws in their ability to grieve, ...
Talking about our loved ones after their death is especially difficult after a suicide. Not only is it painful for the survivor of the loss, but we have the added bonus of the other persons discomfort. That "Oh my gosh, what do I say" face. I think the most frustrating thing for me is the feeling that I have after. This overwhelming sense that I need to defend my dad's character. I have a wide array of stories about my dad, and still to this ...
